My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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