belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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