she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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