I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
