Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.

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(317): View more from Indiana

I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom

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(208): View more from Idaho

New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.

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(219): View more from Indiana

I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth

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(540): View more from Virginia

Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.

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(219): View more from Indiana

Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.

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(509): View more from Washington

I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.

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(619): View more from California

Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?

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(214): View more from Texas

New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!

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