ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
