Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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