Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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