almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
