omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
