This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
