I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
