Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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