i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
only you would photoshop your dick
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize