I am spending my child support on dildos
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
There's always time for handjobs
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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