p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
