He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
