Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
what day is it and did you see me today?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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