apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
