How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
you had me at cake vodka
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
