we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
