you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
