so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
