16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
