So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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