He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize