I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize