So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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