you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
