And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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