bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
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