whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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