Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
