After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
