where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
