I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
