I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
