Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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