I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
wow bdsm is so cute
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
