We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
