your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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