'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
