Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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