Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
