I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Randomize
