During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
