wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
