Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
