oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Randomize