he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
She even gives head with a lisp.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
