I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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